Major New Parent Stressors—and Tips To Handle Them 

Caring for a new baby is a powerful, wonderful experience accompanied by a slew of emotions and feelings—joy, love, the impulse to nurture and protect. Still, becoming a caregiver to an infant is not without its fair share of challenges. 

“Being a new parent is a lot,” says Tanya Altmann, MD, a pediatrician and parenting expert based in Calabasas, California. “Between eating, sleeping, and dirty diapers, there isn’t much time left for parents to take care of themselves.” 

While there is no true guidebook to prepare you for everything that new parenthood has in store, one way to help you be the best caregiver you can be is to understand some of the common struggles and prepare for them to minimize stress and worry. Read on for a few tips on how to ease four common stressors that may come with having a small baby.

Making (and sticking) to a schedule

Mealtimes can be stressful with a fussy baby in tow. One strategy to help both you and your baby is to create a schedule around mealtimes. This can help make sure your baby is getting a sufficient volume of nutrition and eating frequently enough—and it can give you peace of mind. 

Sticking to a consistent feeding schedule is key in making sure your growing baby is healthy. Unfortunately, while eating is somewhat instinctual and we all have the urge to do it, it can sometimes be difficult for babies for a variety of reasons. 

“Some days they’re not hungry, some days they act like they’re starving,” says Jenna Compono, a parent and caregiver with the Aussie Bubs brand community in Highland, Michigan. She advises new parents to go with the flow and listen to your baby and their needs. 

What works for one baby and family may not work for another—which is why it’s important to remember to be flexible and not compare your feeding strategy to others. For instance, Compono’s feeding schedule isn’t strict: “I feed when they’re hungry,” she shares. “In my experience, they do stop when they’re full. As long as they’re eating, that is what is most important.”

If your child consistently isn’t feeding well or has a sudden decrease in appetite, be sure to speak to your pediatrician. 

Finding the best fit for both you and your baby

Caregivers have multiple options when it comes to feeding their baby. Many turn to breastfeeding/chest-feeding as a natural way to provide crucial nutrition as well as bond with their baby. However, some parents are unable to breastfeed/chest-feed or solely rely on it due to physical limitations. Other families may also choose not to—or mix breastfeeding/chest-feeding and formula—for a variety of personal reasons. 

If you can and do choose to breastfeed/chest-feed your child but experience trouble, coaching may help. “Breastfeeding coaching can be done by any healthcare professional with lactation training,” says Dr. Altmann. A professional can advise you with tactics to make the process easier. “Ask your pediatrician as there are also certified lactation consultants available.”

Another option you may choose is bottle feeding with breast milk or formula, both of which are great ways to make sure your baby gets proper nutrition. Bottle feeding also allows caregivers of all kinds to share both the responsibility and benefits. “‘Sharing the feed’ can help allow [the parent] to get more rest and other caregivers to feed and bond with the baby,” says Dr. Altmann.

For many families, choosing formula exclusively or supplementing with formula can be a great way to give your baby the nutrients they need. Dr. Altmann notes: “For caregivers who are unable to provide breastmilk, for babies who need extra calories, or for parents needing or wanting other feeding options, we have high-quality infant formulas now available.”

Dr. Altmann recommends Aussie Bubs’ selection of formulas as a premium, natural option for caregivers of all kinds. “[Aussie Bubs] is a clean label, whole milk infant formula without any added corn syrup or sugars,” she explains. “There are three types: goat milk, which many caregivers are really enjoying as they report it is easier for their infants to digest; organic grass fed cow milk infant formula, which is unique in part as due to the climate in Australia, cows are able to live outdoors all year long; and A2 formula.” The third option, Bubs Supreme, is the brand’s A2 formula—made with natural A2 beta-casein protein cow milk and combines essential, scientifically-backed nutrients—which may be easier to digest for some babies.

A solid daily schedule and consistent nighttime routine can help your baby get sleep regularly, fall asleep faster, and stay asleep longer. 

Blocking out time in your day for activities like play, feeding, bathing and running errands can all be helpful in tiring them out. Also, making sure you have a consistent schedule throughout the week can help set expectations and help both you and your baby get the rest you need. 

Taking walks, having vigorous playtime, and making sure your baby is eating regularly are great strategies to use, according to Dr. Altmann. She puts emphasis on feeding in particular as being a great way to help sleep along. Who hasn’t felt like taking a nap after a good meal?

Whether it’s getting a precious hour of sleep or finally getting around to house chores, free time always seems in short supply with a newborn—and that can make any caregiver anxious and potentially shameful around prioritizing their own wants and needs.

As difficult as may be in the early days, try to set aside time for yourself whenever the opportunity arises. “Every waking second is wrapped around your baby,” Compono explains. “We need self care and love, too! Whether it’s a walk around the block alone or an hour at the gym, it’s important.”

Prioritizing time for other responsibilities can also be difficult. “I found myself stressing about when I’m going to be able to do the laundry, cook, and clean while taking care of a baby,” Compono shares. 

Another concern for caregivers can be other children and managing your time when you have more than one baby in the house. “I’m always feeling guilty that I might not be giving my first born enough time because my second needs me so often,” Compono says. “That ate at me for a while.” Her solution? Spending quality time with her first as her second slept. “We’d play outside, go on walks, play in his playroom, color, etc.” 

When it comes to worries about time and prioritizing her life, Compono says she realized not to stress about it. “Enjoy the snuggles when your baby sleeps on you,” she says. “They are only small for such a short amount of time; the laundry and dishes will always be there.”

Returning to work and needing childcare after spending every moment with your new baby can be very stressful. “It can be hard to leave your baby for the first time, even if you know the caregiver well,” says Dr. Altmann. 

To assuage your worries around finding someone to care for your new baby, Compono suggests starting your search close to home. “Start off with a family member, friend, or someone you trust,” says Compono. “That way, you won’t have to worry—especially for the first few times.” While it may be hard on you both at first, it’s important for your child to get used to you not being around for periods of time.

Once you start looking beyond your loved ones, be diligent about your research. “Whether it’s a babysitter or a daycare, there are background checks and other resources available to help with your decision and trust,” Compono says. Look to your community—digital or otherwise—too. Compono once worked in childcare: “I was actually found on a babysitting website and stayed with the family for ten years. Now we are like family!”